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The Cinematic Katzenjammer: May 5: Haywire


May 5: Haywire

"A black ops super soldier seeks payback after she is betrayed and set up during a mission."

Gina Carano is a MMA lady champion and the star of Haywire. She's not much of an actress but that really doesn't matter when she continually kicks ass for 93 minutes. Mind you, these are not just regular, run-of-the-mill goons that are after her. It's Channing Tatum, Ewan McGregor, Antonio Banderas, and Michael Fassbender. Yes, Carano lays the hurt on all these guys and it is so much fun to watch. All the beat downs make up for the weak plot and acting from the lead. It's a feast of ass-kicking with the brutality of the Bourne films and the sex appeal of Tomb Raider

With Jolie busy adopting babies and saving the world, I give the title of "Sexy Lady Ass-Kicker" to Carano. 

The action sequences are clearly the best part of Haywire. Each brawl is choreographed incredibly well, with merciless punches, kicks, holds, and throws and clearly plays to Carano's strengths as a martial artist. Her scenes with dialogue are rather weak and it's when she's beating up one of the "manly" men in the cast that she shines. Her acting is not horrible, but clearly needs work. She's a fighter first and then an actress, and Steven Sodenberg, the director, is very aware of this fact. He lets Carano loose and uses as few scenes as he can to build the story. And it works. 

Payback for Step Up

I would recommend Haywire for the action alone. The plot is the cliche- secret agent gets betrayed and goes after all those who wronged her. It's nothing original or fresh, but simply a plot device to let Carano show off her skills. The big name men of the movie are great in their roles but each role, smaller than the next, clearly shows they're in the film for star power. Also, it's much more rewarding watching a girl beat the crap out of people we know, and not no-name Eastern European C-list actors. Overall, Haywire is worth a rental and your time, and shows the very rough beginnings of a possible action star in Gina Carano. 

The Good:
incredible fight sequences filmed to perfection
The Bad:
weak acting by Carano but nothing that ruins the movie (plus if you make fun of her she'll slap you...with fists)
The Ugly:
having a bunch of great actors in a movie and giving them each about 10-15 minutes of screen time

Overall: 6.7/10


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