Sept 9: Payback

"Porter is shot by his wife and best friend and is left to die. When he survives he plots revenge."

Directed by: Brian Helgeland, Rated: R, 100 minutes

In a recent discussion I had with the guys of As You Watch (my podcast), we discussed our favorite revenge movies. Bubba of Flights, Tights, and Movie Nights mentioned that one of his favs is Payback, the 1999 Mel Gibson movie of sweet, sweet, revenge. I had seen the film years ago and decided to revisit it for the blog today, and while it's a pretty good movie, it's not as special as I remember it being. The film does do a great job at reminding is that Mel Gibson was once a badass and that he wasn't always hating Jews, making Jesus movies, or beating his significant other (well, he could have, but as we weren't aware of it at the time, he still had his couple of decades of awesome). 

Is this the face of a maniac psycho or one of the world's greatest super villains? 

Payback follows Porter (Gibson), a criminal who does whatever he wants, to whomever he wants. His best friend and partner, Val (Gregg Henry) brings a job to Porter, where they plan on robbing the Triads (I think at least? Whenever there's an Asian gang you can just assume it's the Triads). Once the heist is over with, Val and Porter's wife, Lynn (Deborah Kara Unger) betray Porter, shooting him in the chest and leaving him for dead. Of course, this being a revenge movie and all, Porter doesn't die but comes back looking for vengeance. As it turns out, there was just enough money in the heist to cover Val's gambling debts (about $140,000) and Porter goes through the chain of command seeking his mini fortune, just because it's his. Dirty cops and of course the Triads want their money back and as Porter looks for what he thinks his rightfully his, his enemies grow closer. Throw in a sexy little part for Lucy Liu and some other recognizable faces (David Paymer, William Devane, and Mario Bello), and Payback proves to be a fun little film. It's also worth mentioning that it's pretty damn violent, but what revenge flick isn't?

Ooh. 'Dem Freckles!

The best part of Payback is seeing Gibson kick a lot of ass. As he's the anti-hero we're supposed to root for, he seems to be immortal, cutting down or shooting everyone that gets in his way. Nothing can stop him and it's the best part of the film. He's an asshole of epic proportions, but when he exists in a crime world with even bigger assholes, he's the guy to root for. He's all about shooting first and asking questions later and the amount of times we seem pulling a trigger sooner than you'd expect leave the film packed full of surprises. By all means, he's no expert marksman or kung-fu master, but he doesn't let the 'bad guys' finish sentences, just finishes them off because he's pissed off at everyone. Porter is a great character that I feel would have been great in multiple movies, as though Porter is to Gibson what Harry Callahan is to Clint Eastwood. The only that's missing is a handful of catchphrases and a .44 Magnum. 

Gibson beats his lovers, Eastwood talks to empty chairs. What has become of this world?!

Sure Payback is fun, but by all means it's no perfect film. There are a handful of pacing problems in the film, especially when it comes to developing the characters. When Porter's on fire, it's so much fun to watch, but when he calms down for a drink or a conversation, you just want thinks to get moving even quicker. Even the plot, which is so direct in its motive, is not the strongest of stories. However, Mel Gibson saves Payback from being incredibly forgettable with his charisma and badass-appeal. He turns an otherwise average movie into something worth watching and is the main reason I'd recommend it. 

The Good:
Mel Gibson kicking ass and showing the world he wasn't always off his rocker
The Bad:
a weak story that leaves a lot to be desired that focuses a little too much on character building and not enough on the violence
The Ugly:
realizing how bad the movie would really be had Mel Gibson not starred in it

Overall: 6.7/10

Trailer:

July 29: Signs

"A family living on a farm finds mysterious crop circles in their fields which suggests something more frightening to come."

Directed by: M. Night Schamsadmalmlamalmlman Rated: PG-13, 106 minutes

Signs is the best movie to use when explaining the career of M. Night Shouldertocryon. He's a terrific visual director, capturing suspense brilliantly, but cannot direct actors worth a damn. The dude is a horrible script-writer as well, only hindering his ability to direct people as it's hard to get good performances through disgusting scripts. Wooden characters and cheesy dialogue destroy an incredibly creepy film, and a cop-out ending just makes matters worse. I consider Signs the rather quick downfall of Schmayancalendarman, as it's nowhere near the quality of his first two major films, The Sixth Sense and Unbreakable. 

"I see a dead career."

Signs follows Mel Gibson's Rev. Graham Hess, the patriarch to a farming family, and his struggling to accept the fact there may be more than just us out there, while coping with the death of his wife. Merrill (Joaquin Phoenix), Graham's brother, also lives with him and his two kids, Morgan (Rory Culkin) and Bo (Abigail Breslin). It's worth noting that both of his kids are pretty f**ked up in their own ways, as Morgan is a conspiracy theorist and Bo can't finish a damn glass of water (which is just too convenient later on). After crop circles appear on the Hess farm, strange things begin happening and the media becomes obsessed with the idea that we may have "visitors". I don't think it's giving much away when I say that there is indeed, aliens, and they creepily invade around the world. The scariest parts of the movie are the "amateur" home videos that are shown on the news, featuring the aliens and their arrival. As I stated, Shimoleon can craft some incredibly suspenseful scenes and builds up to scares very well, but besides that, Signs absolutely sucks. 

'Nuff said. 

There's really not a lot more to say about Signs that I haven't already said. It's an easy film to critique because it simply doesn't have a lot going for it. The scares are solid, and the buildups are intense, but everything else, from the dialogue to the acting, ruins the film as a whole. Mel Gibson seems to phone in his performance, and with his headlining news and personal life issues, Signs has not aged as well as one would think. Gibson is far from the character he plays and thinking the man can be a "family man" whose faith is tested leaves a sour taste. The two child actors are great in their roles, but their characters are such mini caricatures that they come across more laughable than anything else. Skip Signs if you haven't already seen it. If you have, I'm sorry. 

The Good:

suspenseful scenes that genuinely scare

The Bad:

those same scenes ruined the moment after with some shitty dialogue and/or piss poor acting

The Ugly:

M. Night Shockakahn thinking he has the ability to tell a story, when in fact that's his biggest weakness

Overall: 3.6/10

Trailer:

May 29: Get the Gringo- 150th Review!

**REVIEW #150**

"A career criminal (Gibson) nabbed by Mexican authorities is placed in a tough prison where he learns to survive with the help of a 9-year-old boy."

Get the Gringo is a fine example of Mel Gibson's ability to kick ass. Yes boys and girls, he still has it in him. Forget his racist rants and drunken tantrums. Forget his domestic abuse and his seemingly abandoned Australian accent. He is still an action star and Get the Gringo proves it. I can only assume this film didn't get a large release because of Gibson's personal life issues and bad public image but it really deserves one. It has a great story, fun action, and a rather unique (yet entertaining) setting. It's a lot like Lethal Weapon, set in Mexico, but instead of Danny Glover as his partner, Gibson teams up with a 10 year old boy with a "magic liver". 

Oh, I forgot to mention the clowns...(yes that's Gibson)

The story follows Gibson's unnamed character who's a career criminal that finds himself locked up in a Mexican prison. The prison, however, is not your usual Shawshank and is actually its own, self-contained town called "The Pueblito", run by a crime lord and his thugs. Living in the prison is a kid (again, no name) and his mother. Gibson runs into the kid and the two bond over cigarettes and a drink (no, really) and he finds out the kid's previously mentioned "magic liver" is the perfect match for the crime lord who is slowly dying from liver problems. Because of the important organ, the kid is watched like a hawk and thus Gibson's new friendship with the boy raises a lot of red flags. A bunch of shit goes down (including a badass shootout in the middle of the prison) and Gibson finds himself owing a big favor to the crime lord. He's sent out of the prison and Mexico altogether, and has to track down and kill, surprise, another crime lord in the US (played by the creepy awesome Peter Stormare). The film blends action, chase, spy, and hit-man elements into a somewhat over-the-top ride that really keeps your attention.

With the awful luck Gibson's character has, you can only assume his boy Jesus left him out to dry and die in Mexico.

I would definitely recommend Get the Gringo. I saw a trailer for it awhile ago and have been waiting for my chance to watch it and it really did deliver. Sure, parts of the film are very formulaic and predictable (even cheesy at times) but the entire thing has so much style and clever writing that it's faults are easily forgivable. The film does have a lot of the dialogue in Spanish and I found some of the subtitles a little difficult to read, but even the missed bits don't hinder the story. Get the Gringo can be found on demand as of now, and I am not sure of a DVD release date, so it may be hard to watch. If you can, track it down because it's very much worth your time and a semi-nostalgic reminder of Mel Gibson's ability to kick ass. 

The Good:

great combination of action, drama, and comedy that turns a could be disaster into something you want to watch

The Bad:

knowing that Mel Gibson probably doesn't have many of these (if any) left in his "talent" 

The Ugly:

Mexico prisons, even if they are the "world's shittiest shopping mall"

Overall: 7.5/10

Trailer:

Also, please feel free to comment on any (and every) post. This time of the year is rather difficult when it comes to Netflix and DVD releases and I could use some suggestions of what to watch. I'll reward comments with virtual high-fives and fist-bumps, as well as an empty promise to change your life.