Nov 18: It's Complicated

"When attending their son's college graduation, a couple reignite the spark in their relationship...but the complicated fact is they're divorced and he's remarried."

Directed by: Nancy Meyers, Rated: R, 120 minutes

It's Complicated is a fine example of a film about beautiful rich people with "normal" problems. Literally everyone on screen, from Meryl Streep to Alec Baldwin, and even their children, have anything they could ask for and enough money to buy anything else. They are all successful, good looking, and drink champagne with breakfast and wine with dinner. It's a cookie cutter ensemble of "upper" middle-class and as the audience, we watch everything get taken apart and put back together again in just 90 minutes. It's that easy. Aren't you jealous?

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. We're so rich!"

Successful and beautiful, Jane Adler (Streep) has it all. She has a booming bakery business that has the most gorgeous storefront and a house that's way too big for her to live in. Her ex-husband, Jake (Baldwin) is just as successful and happily remarried to Agness (Lake Bell). After the two meet up again for their son's college graduation, her loneliness and his desires cross paths and they end up in bed. With a little pep in her step and her ex's physical attraction rising, Jane is conflicted. To make matters worse, Adam Schaffer (Steve Martin), an architect working on her house, proves to be the exact thing she's been looking for. Thus, the title. It all gets complicated. 

As I mentioned, the over-the-top perfection of everyone's lives in the film is very frustrating. While one can argue that while you have everything, material-wise, it's the emotional core that makes you "rich", but it never really focuses on that. It's more of a heart-warming little romantic comedy that exists in this world and everything else is just the glossy finish. It's a movie that had to have been incredibly fun to make, as the three leads are legends in their own right. It's Complicated also glosses over the idea of divorce and leads you to believe rich people broken up get along swimmingly after going their separate ways. From what I know, when a wealthy couple breaks up, shit's divided like a storm and someone's out to get the other one. That aside, the film is still a bit entertaining. Streep, Baldwin, and Martin are all perfect in their roles and the collaboration is fun to watch. They certainly carry the weight of the film and the rich-problems complaints I have are easier to digest with the three of them, as opposed to lesser caliber and known actors.

 Nothing hides a wiener like a knock-off Apple product. 

It's Complicated is a safe little movie that's easy to swallow. The R-rating is pretty much for just one scene featuring the "devil's lettuce". It reminds me of something you'd watch on the holidays with your mom, aunts, and grandmothers as they all get drunk on boxed wine. It's a girly movie that's not just for the romantic comedy fans and has enough charm to make it worth your time. While I don't recommend running out to see it, it's something you can watch on a weekend evening when you've got nothing else to do. If anything, watch it for Alec Baldwin who's having a blast in the role and whose energy is contagious. But, I guess if I was this rich, I'd live a similar life as well. It'd be nice knowing rich problems are dismissed with a laugh and a glass of Merlot.

The Good:

three terrific central performances that elevate the film above decency

The Bad:

rich people with rich problems, all very hard to relate to

The Ugly:

wondering how many rich people actually have problems this... PG and the outcome of most of them

Overall: 6.4/10

Discussion Question:

Are films like this, The Father of the Bride, The Holiday, You've Got Mail, Something's Gotta Give, relatable?

Trailer:

Oct 19: Insidious

"A family looks to prevent evil spirits from trapping their comatose child in a realm called The Further."

Directed by: James Wan, Rated: PG-13, 103 minutes

I have always been against PG-13 horror movies, thinking they can never go places you'd never expect or that the violence and terror would be too tame. Insidious turns all of those notions on its side, and delivers a very scary movie that goes plenty of places you won't expect and has genuinely uncomfortable scares, as opposed to the constant jump-out gimmick so many movies utilize. The third act, however, is a little disappointing but the film as a whole still delivers on the creepy goods and sticks with you. 

F**k you, word!

Rose Byrne and Patrick Wilson play a young couple, Renai & Josh, with three kids, Foster, Dalton, and a newborn girl. As any horror movie would start, the family is seen moving into a new house. It's beautiful, it's old, and it's the perfect setting for something haunted. Dalton (Ty Simpkins) goes to sleep one night and never wakes up. Worried, his parents rush him to the hospital but after plenty of tests, the doctors cannot figure out what is wrong with him, he's just simply slipped into a coma. Renai begins seeing things- apparitions hovering over her baby's crib and a figure standing outside a window. Convinced the place is haunted, Renai convinces Josh to move. Once arrived in their new home, the haunting continues and the couple is terrified. Not knowing what's going on, they call in a specialist (Lin Shaye), and she discovers that Dalton is an astral projector, someone who uses out of body experiences in his/her sleep to "explore" different realms. The reason Dalton is in the coma is because he's wandered too far into the darkness and his soul and mind are in danger. Thus, Renai and Josh must figured out a way to save their son from these demons haunting them, lingering around and waiting for his body to be "released" for possession. 

Rose is beautiful, but she keeps playing the same exasperated, overwhelmed characters. Let's see a smile already. 

Insidious crawls under your skin and plants itself deep inside you, festering and oozing out all sorts of psychological creep. Director James Wan (Saw- the good one) is a very good director, using an eerie edge to his films similar to what Fincher implemented in Se7en. There's a large attention paid to detail and sounds, drawing you only to hurl you across the room once the tables change. Sure, the jumpy gimmicks are still present and some scares are accentuated with loud music, but for the most part Insidious works slowly and burrows itself inside you. The entire idea behind the film is very original and it really changes up the idea of a haunted house story, turning it more into a haunted person tale. The entire film is full of dread, because you continually anticipate each new scare and the music has an almost-constant heartbeat to it, putting you on edge even further. It's a great buildup that actually delivers for once and makes you hate what you're watching. Seriously, Insidious has moments that just rape themselves into your mind, creeping you the f**k out.

And this song... why, why why? So. Creepy. No. Ass.  

Insidious is terrific for about 95 minutes. The ending leaves you very frustrated, almost hating how the entire thing is concluded. But moving past that, it's still a terrific horror movie in a day and age where the good ones are damn near impossible to come across. Insidious is a success in large part to the direction of James Wan and the acting, led by the ever-likable Patrick Wilson, a man you want to see no harm done to but continually gets tortured, scared, or abused (see Hard Candy). I don't scare easily. It really takes a lot to get me spooked but Insidious manages to tip-toe the line between the horrific and the cliche and deliver something worth watching. Sure, it'll most certainly be ruined by its sequels (you know they're coming), but in the meantime, I highly recommend it. Just turn it off when there's about 10 minutes left. 

The Good:
a continued layer of horror that leaves you very uncomfortable, with a dissonant score that exaggerates the bizarre and a constant heartbeat that leaves you on edge
The Bad:
a few scares that get you because of the jump factor and then immediately hate because they're so gimmicky
The Ugly:
f**k this movie's ending... it is so terribly lazy and reveals way too much, taking away a lot of the horror it hoped to create

Overall: 7.4/10

Trailer:

Jan 10: I Saw the Devil

"When his pregnant fiancee becomes the latest victim of a serial killer, a secret agent blurs the line between good and evil in his pursuit of revenge."

   So, I thought I would be doing this blog with all fresh movies, or films that I haven't seen before; however, some movies just call back to you for a second viewing and this is one of them. 

  I Saw the Devil is a South Korean film, directed by Jee-woon Kim, who also directed The Good, The Bad, and the Weird and is now in production on his first English speaking film, starring the Terminator himself, Mr. Ahnuld Schawrastzanegar. 

I em bahk, bahbee. 

  The film follows a secret agent who, after his fiancé is murdered, vows to get revenge on her murderer. Now, revenge is kind of a big deal in South Korea, or, at least, according to their films (Oldboy, Mother, and pretty much anything with Vengeance in the title). 

   While on his quest to deliver his revenge, our hero marks and tracks the killer from place to place. Yes friends, he does not kill him right away. He GPS's his ass and just before the killer's about to attack someone new, the hero pops up and beats the living shit out of him over, and over, and over. It's something I have never seen in a film before and I absolutely love the idea of that dish best served cold being handed out for each meal of the day.

It's pretty much Kill Bill if there were about 9 Volumes.

   I am usually against remakes, because half of the time they blow harder than a turbine on a Boeing 457, but I would totally be welcome to having this one re-did. But, not because I found this film sub-par but because I loved the story so much, I want a larger audience to lay witness to it. So, yes, the story was exciting and very original. I cannot wait to see what other stories of revenge come out of South Korea (I'm assuming it's one of their biggest exports). 

The Avenger, shipping out 25,000 pounds of Imgonnagetyou.

   

   So, obviously a script doesn't make a movie alone. The acting was very impressive. Starring Oldboy himself, Min-sik Choi is the terrifying serial killer and Byung-hun Lee, is the Bourne-like secret agent out for revenge. Both take and give beatings you wouldn't even think anyone could survive. The fight scenes are filmed with intensity and rage and are all shot beautifully and stylized. The violence is very graphic, including a scene where an Achilles heel is cut through with a scalpel. The scene literally made my heel cringe, a motion usually reserved for when I try to force my foot into a new pair of shoes because I am too lazy to tie them every time.

They laugh when they're free. 

   I love I Saw the Devil and would hope more people would give the film a shot. Ignore the fact that it's subtitled. A lot of people don't even read books anymore, so do the next logical thing and read your movies. Some of the best films are not American, and I think it's about time more of us give them a chance. Check Netflix, your local Redbox or Blockbuster, and really give the foreign films an opportunity to blow your mind.

Sight: Jee-woon Kim is one hell of a director, and everything he makes is gorgeous and full of color, even if it's massive amounts of blood. 

Sound: I Saw the Devil's score is just as intense as the subject matter and packs quite the punch during the more emotional scenes. 

Skill: Like I mentioned before, the acting is incredible, as is expected when you have such great actors in each of the main roles. 

Script: Original, violent, and emotional, the script is excellent and the dialogue between the killer and his "hunter" are perfect.

Overall: 9.6/10

Best Quote: 

Kim Soo-hyeon: "I will kill you when you are in the most pain. When you're in the most pain, shivering out of fear, then I will kill you. That's a real revenge. A real complete revenge."

Jan 5: Ironclad

"In 13th-century England, a small group of Knights Templar fight to defend Rochester Castle against the tyrannical King John."

   Ironclad is a gore fest with a crap ton of violence, absolutely no plot, and just mere flashing moments of decent acting. The movie follows nearly every Middle Age film cliche from having almost the entire cast die for a "cause" (that's never clear) to the old fart badass who fights to the end. Don't forget the cliche maiden in love with the noble warrior who is a "bad man for killing many". 
   The battle scenes in the movie are a poorly patched quilt of violence made by a blind butcher's wife. The camera work makes you dizzy and, like every movie featuring sword fights, you get absolutely no chance to actually sit back and enjoy the violence. You just watch it blur across the screen and spin around like a kid about to pin the tail on the donkey.

It's like this but with less plot.

   The acting in Ironclad is very hit and miss. The cast features a handful of "that guy" actors, or dudes you see in everything but never cared enough to look up their names. Paul Giamatti plays the evil King John and kicks ass in the role. He has a very angry voice and his yelling matches with all of his subjects prove to be the only decent dialogue in the movie. 

Like that, but louder. And better.

   Overall, Ironclad is a nothing of a movie, but more of a gore-fest with a decent amount of lines spoken with horrible British accents...and a lot of yelling. So, if you're in the mood for exposed bones, smashed heads, blood sprays and shouting, this movie is for you. Also, they burn a bunch of pigs. Apparently they burn hot and melt stone? And now all I picture is a castle of bacon... 

Sight: Horrible camera work for the fight scenes. Cheesy special effects when it comes to buildings falling down, but a lot of realistic limb severing. Not that I would know. 

Sound: It has your never original Medieval score, with chants and/or bagpipes. I can't tell anymore.

Skill: Screaming and bleeding and dying don't necessarily need a lot of acting chops. 

Script: Like I have said, practically no plot and awful dialogue. There is one monologue towards the end that saves any hope the script would have had. And yes, it was shouted.

Score: 5.7/10

Best Quote:

Absolutely nothing worth mentioning, but a guy does have a catapult boulder launched through his face.