April 2: Yogi Bear

"A documentary filmmaker travels to Jellystone Park to shoot a project and soon crosses paths with Yogi Bear, his sidekick Boo-Boo, and Ranger Smith."

   I am quite surprised that I watched any part of Yogi Bear, let alone the entire film. It is everything that is horrible about movies these days. It rapes a classic character to a poorly rendered CGI death, while including poop jokes and animals dancing to songs that are decades old. Dan Aykroyd attempts to voice the title character, and he does poorly, as does Justin Timberlake as Boo Boo. They sound nothing like the classic Hanna-Barbera cartoon and I think the filmmakers thought kids these days wouldn't even know who Yogi was, thus allowing the voice actors to do whatever they wanted with the characters. This isn't a case when the movie tries too hard, it's a case of "this movie should never exist". There really is no redeeming factor to the film and you can't even lie to yourself that it's good. 

You can't wash away the shame or the memories of watching this film. 

   The plot in Yogi Bear is just as bad as the film's concept. Ranger Smith, Yogi, and friends have to raise a certain amount of money to save Jellystone National Park from falling into the hands of an "evil" man who wants the land for something or whatnot. It's the same old plot you've seen in countless TV shows and movies, and Yogi Bear brings nothing new to the table (shocking!).  After just seeing trailers of the movie, I knew it looked awful but, after watching it, it's even worse. And, it absolutely pisses me off that shit like this can make $90 million at the box office and of course "deserve" a sequel. 

Just like these f**ked up, unnecessary, squealing little shithead rodents

    Yogi Bear needs to be skipped as though your life depends on it. Luckily the movie was only on TV and I didn't pay a dime to watch it. I was never the biggest fan of Yogi Bear, but I do know that this film is in no way a proper movie adaptation of the cartoon. The film features horrible special effects and green screen action sequences, as well as shitty acting by the human "co-stars" and the audacity to have a Morgan Freeman wannabe narrate the film. You don't f**k with God and you don't f**k with classic characters. You just don't. 

The Bad:

the fact that this movie was green-lit 

The Worse:

the fact that this movie was a box-office hit

The Worst:

the film itself

Overall: 1.2/10

Trailer:

Hey, it's much more entertaining