Sept 7: Snatch

"Unscrupulous boxing promoters, violent bookmakers, a Russian gangster, incompetent amateur robbers, and supposedly Jewish jewelers fight to track down a priceless stolen diamond."

Directed by: Guy Ritchie, Rated: R, 104 minutes

So watching Safe, among a few other things, made me want to revisit Snatch (another Statham vehicle), the 2000 Guy Ritchie film that many (including myself) consider to be his best movie. It's hilarious on an entirely unique level and packs the style and energy Ritchie's become known for. It's also worth mentioning the performances of a huge cast, with the standout being the obvious with Brad Pitt, who plays a gypsy bare-knuckle boxer no one can understand. Some may complain that the plot is very similar to Ritchie's first film, Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels, but Snatch is much more fun. It's as though Ritchie honed his craft with Lock, Stock and mastered it with Snatch.

Whenever you have The Stath in his natural element, and Pitt out of his, you know you're going to have a good time. 

The plot follows Turkish (Statham), a boxer promoter who just wants a new caravan to work out of (you know, to be more professional). He sends his partner, Tommy (Stephen Graham), to a campsite full of pikeys (or gypsies) to acquire something fancier. At the campsite, Tommy meets Mickey O'Neil (Brad Pitt), who's clearly the 'leader' of the camp, as well as a champion boxer. After the deal goes sour, Tommy's bodyguard, Gorgeous George, challenges Mickey to a fight in order to get their money back. Of course, Mickey takes George out with one punch and puts Tommy and Turkish into an awful position, as he was going to fight for them in just a few days. Not wanting to completely back out of the fight (and lose their balls, money, and everything else they would like to hold onto), Turkish tells the other promoter, a crime lord named Brick Top (Alan Ford), that he'll find another fighter to replace George and heads back to Mickey for another favor. Meanwhile, Franky Four Fingers (Benicio Del Toro) has a stolen 86 karat diamond on his hands and plans on selling it for millions. As the diamond shifts hands between all sorts of gangsters, from Boris the Blade, to a bunch of 'unprofessional' criminals who moonlight as pawn shop owners, and even an American (Dennis Farina) and Bullet Tooth Tony (Vinnie Jones), who owes who what gets even more complicated. Every different story is connected in it's own odd way and seeing it all come together in the end is absolutely brilliant. But it all does make sense in the end.

You do not f**k with Brick Top. The glasses alone tell you to watch yo'self before he wrecks yo'self. 

If the above synopsis sounds confusing, I apologize. Ritchie's films tend to be so complex, yet ridiculously simple at the end, and explaining what happens is rather tricky. However, it's in these twists and turns of the plot that Snatch shines, as you cannot expect what will happen next and if a certain character even survives the film. So much happens in such a short amount of time and it's a credit to Ritchie's use of quick-cuts and high energy scenes that help bring it all together in the end. Snatch is easily his best film and as much as I like his Sherlock Holmes films, I'd love to see him return to the gangster genre that made him famous. As for Snatch, Brad Pitt absolutely steals the show as Mickey. He's both brutal and hilarious, and seeing him blend Tyler Durden with an awesome (and probably unintentional) impression of Colin Farrel and every other Irishman is so much fun to watch. He's incredibly hard to watch, but as opposed to confusing the audience, the characters that talk with him in the movie are just as confused, leaving it as a recurring joke that just makes you smile.

The film also features a squeaking dog. That is all. 

As you can tell, I'd highly recommend this flick. It's the perfect blend of comedy and action and manages to combine ridiculous situations with a touch of realism that makes everything work. It's certainly a Ritchie film and while many have tried to duplicate his style, he's still the master of his 'genre'. The characters are all colorful and fully-fleshed out and each story that unfolds is more exciting than the previous. Everything works and the final product is worth all of your time and effort. You'll laugh, you'll cringe, and you'll be shocked at a lot of what plays out on screen. Not many movies can do that effectively so when you can find one like Snatch, you know it's a keeper. 

The Good:

unexpected turns that leave you floored, but also makes you laugh the moment after (or even during)

The Better:

a great cast filled to the brim with character actors you'd recognize from everything, led by the terrific Brad Pitt who wanted to make the film because of how much he loved Guy Ritchie

The Best:

it's fun and original... something you never get these days

Overall: 8.8/10

Trailer:

April 29: Titan A.E.

"A young man learns that he has to find a hidden Earth ship before an enemy alien species does in order to secure the survival of humanity."

Titan A.E. is a very underrated movie in the visuals department. It has terrific animation that still looks pretty damn cool, even after 12 years. It's a good "bridge" film in that it uses both old-school and new-school animation techniques, combining hand drawn animation with CGI. Parts of the movie actually look real and the effects are certainly the best part of the film. The story is set far into the future where an alien race, known as the Drej, destroys Earth. Thousands of humans were able to flee the planet before it's demise and drift through space as laborers and thieves, always looked down upon by the other alien races. Cale Tucker (Matt Damon), a human whose father was involved with Earth's evacuation, discovers he holds the key to unlocking the secrets of a spaceship called the Titan, a spaceship said to have the power to create a new Earth, uniting all humans. Cale, along with his entourage of rather unique alien friends (and Drew Barrymore), travel through space to find the Titan before it falls into the hands of the Drej. 

How convenient that the aliens...

Were designed simply enough to be mass-produced as cheap little toys.

Titan A.E. completely bombed at the box office. With a budget of nearly $75 million, it was only able to rake in about half of that. I think a reason behind that is because Titan A.E.. was designed to be a kids a movie, when in reality it has very little elements a kid would not only understand, but enjoy. The plot is rather depressing when you think about it. Billions of people die and the only survivors become refugees in space, eking out what little they can. The aliens also speak in a foreign language and are subtitled. I don't know if it's just me, but I don't remember wanting to read a damn thing when I went to see a movie when I was 7 or 8. 

But when I was at home, it was all about mother f**king Animorphs. 

I would, with some hesitance, recommend Titan A.E.. Visually, it's amazing and it is something I actually wouldn't mind paying a little extra to see in 3D. However, the film never finds its audience, jumping all around the place. It starts off as a dramatic sci-fi movie where everyone dies, then tries to turn everything around with quirky aliens for the kids. You don't go from the Holocaust to playing with action figures, do you?

The Good:

terrific special effects that blend the old and the new

The Bad:

a depressing plot point sugar coated with alien friends and Matt Damon

The Ugly:

seeing how one film can tank an entire animation studio 

Overall: 5.2/10

Trailer:

March 15: Gangster No. 1

"Chronicles the rise and fall of a prominent, and particularly ruthless English gangster."

   Gangster No. 1 is brutal, violent, psychotic, and... let's say unique. Paul Bettany stars as a gangster who will do whatever it takes to be the king. Bettany is amazing in the role, as The Gangster, and shows that he is still one of today's most underrated and underused talents. He's charismatic, creepy, and just plain insane. He definitely carries an otherwise average film. As a whole, the film is just as messy as the violence. There is a small, very underdeveloped plot and it's certainly the same story we've seen countless times before. The acting is decent, by the supporting roles, but no one quite shines as much as Bettany. Malcolm McDowell plays the older version of The Gangster, and while the rest of the cast get makeup overhauls to play their older selves, McDowell's presence is distracting. I feel his role in the film was only to remind the viewers of A Clockwork Orange, which Gangster No. 1 seems to borrow heavily from. 

Sadly, there is no Korova Milkbar.

   The best part of Gangster No. 1 is the camerawork. Paul McGuigan, the director, utilizes many scenes filmed from the first person, bringing the violence into your living room. There is one scene that stands out, in particular, where Bettany's character is torturing a man. The viewpoint is through the eyes of the victim, and Bettany's insanity is witnessed first hand. As the man loses consciousness, the camera fades in and out, as well as portraying the sound of the man's head being bludgeoned. The entire scene is haunting and Gangster No. 1 is worth watching just for it alone. 

This happens. 

   Overall, Gangster No. 1 is an average crime flick with fleeting moments of brilliance and terror. There is a particular effect where Bettany screams and a loud static rings in your ears, that I have never seen before, and found it to be very effective in showing the man's spiral into insanity. Bettany is the best part of the film and replacing him, when he's older, with a much less talented (or in this case, over-acting) Malcolm McDowell was just a bad decision. There is continued narration throughout the film that seemingly steals lines from Bettany, and I wish he was given an even bigger opportunity to show off what skill he has. I would recommend Gangster No. 1, with hesitance because, although the material is familiar, it's execution is unique and rather obscure. 

The Good:

Paul Bettany... before he had to be a priest in everything (see The Da Vinci Code, The Reckoning, Priest, and similarly in Legion)

The Bad: 

poor storytelling that jumps around a little too much

The Ugly:

a scene of torture that makes you cringe

Overall: 6.7/10

Best Quote:

Gangster: One day I'll catch up with you. You want a war? I'll give you a f**king war one arm tied behind me back. I'll shoot you - blow you to kingdom come. They'll need a dustpan and brush to scrape you off the walls. Make mincemeat out of ya. Pie and mash, puddles of blood. I'll leave you lying there. Go rot, the lot of you. Calling me a c**t?  

Watch This Instead:

Snatch- still one of the best London crime movies to date

The Departed- Scorsese.. 'nuff said

Bronson- read my review here to see why. 

Casino- one of my favorite DeNiro films

Trailer: